A Modest Proposal for the Rioters in DC Protesting Inauguration Day

So, Donald Trump was inaugurated today, and there was much rejoicing. Winners are supposed to celebrate, so that is good.  There was also a lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth.  That’s OK, too.

And then there was this.  (Like idiots, they smashed the windows in a Starbucks.  Starbucks, as a business, is as far left as they come.)

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And this.  (Destroying an unused limo only hurts the driver, if he is inside.  Morons):

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and this:

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There is plenty of video too, of protesters setting fires, smashing windows, and occasionally hurting policemen.  Here is one:

The DC riot police are now Trump’s to command, and he faces some choices.

If the riot police use the force that is needed to end this quickly (which arsonists, rioters, and vandals deserve), we will never hear the end of the complaints about police brutality.  If he lets them get away with it, that is also very bad.  They will just go burn down another city the next time they get mad.  And there are an awful lot of people to arrest and prosecute, so even with their best efforts they will only be able to punish a small number of these criminals.

So here is an idea that should be pursued in aditional to any criminal charges.

The riot police should use their batons and shields and firehoses and teargas to herd these protesters  (or at least a large portion of them) into a confined area, like they were preparing to arrest them.  And then they should wait.

For hours.

In an area where the protesters have no food.

Or water.

Or bathroom facilities.

Just let them stew in their own juices for maybe 12 hours.  Or 24 or even 36 if they are being real jerks.

They won’t be able to complain about brutality, and there won’t be any video generated that will discredit the new administration.  There will just be a bunch of pathetic, cold, filthy, hungry vandals and arsonists.

 

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Sympathy for the Debbie (Wasserman Schultz, That Is)

Poor Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-Fla). In a recent New York Times interview, she made a remark about younger women, who are apparently not so excited about Hillary:

Do you notice a difference between young women and women our age in their excitement about Hillary Clinton? Is there a generational divide? Here’s what I see: a complacency among the generation of young women whose entire lives have been lived after Roe v. Wade was decided.

For this comment, a number of conservatives are annoyed, but fragile young leftist women, feeling hurt by her comments, are now screaming for her head.   Sometimes the revolution eats its own.

Like most Floridians, she can sense when the sharks are in the water, so she quickly backtracked with a few tweets like this, where she tried to identify herself with this younger generation:

I want to be clear about this: Many in *my generation* got complacent after Roe, thinking the fight for safe, legal abortion was over. 1/6

What she said in the New York Times interview and what she said in her Tweet can only both be true if she is less than 43 years old.  Which she obviously isn’t.

As a conservative who is amused by her stumbles, and as a father of young ladies, I am happy to help explain this “complacency” among young women.  It is not so much “complacency” as it is a sharp division of opinion.

Ms. Wasserman Schultz is surely aware that children tend to be like their parents.  This may be why, in a moment when her Jewishness trumped her liberalism, she was caught on tape saying that intermarriage was “a problem” for Jewish people.  Children of interfaith marriages tend to leave Judaism because they were not fully raised in it.  She is right about this, though her thought is hardly original, and when confronted, she backtracked again.  Heck, Moses, Ezra, and Nehemiah said that it was a bad idea for Jews to marry non-Jews, unless they converted first.

Now, if children tend to grow up sharing the beliefs of their parents, then let’s apply this thought to the issue of beliefs about abortion.  If you attend a pro-life event, you will typically see a lot of young people and moms pushing strollers.  This is because, on average, pro-life people tend to have more babies (this is not just a Catholic phenomenon), who have a good chance of growing up to be pro-life.

In contrast, while some of the children of strongly pro-choice parents hold their parents’ views, many of the children of strongly pro-choice parents are not politically active at all.  In fact, they are not active at all, because they were never born.  And so there is evidence that the younger generation, despite being more liberal on most social issues, is more conservative on abortion than the generation before it.

So Debbie, lighten up.  The problem is not complacency, it is that your side is making yourselves extinct by putting your views into practice.  This is unfortunate, but you cannot say that we pro-lifers failed to warn you.

 

Ellen Goodman Gets the Vapors (Or, Why Siri Can’t Find an Abortion Clinic)

Poor Ellen Goodman.  After years of having to look stuff up in the phone book, and then a few years of being able to look for things online, Siri, the ultimate electronic adviser, comes along.  Instead of being thankful, she is worried, and has come out of retirement to write  this column.

Siri can do many things for her.  For example, if she wants to find the nearest Chinese restaurant, Siri will find it for her.  If she needs to hide the body of the next man who crosses her, Siri will advise her of the location of the nearest landfill.  However, when she asked it to find birth control, it responded that it “could not find any birth control clinics.”  (Hint for Ellen:  There is an aisle at any Rite-Aid, CVS, or Wal-Mart where you can find lots of stuff.  Or you could ask your doctor.)  Worse yet, if she wants to find out where to get an abortion, Siri usually won’t tell her.  In fact, it might refer her to a crisis pregnancy center, where they might, horror of horrors, show her an ultrasound of the baby, beating heart and all, and try to persuade her to keep the child.  (This is all theoretical, of course.  Ms. Goodman is 70 years old.  But some younger, more impressionable female might take Siri’s advice and end up keeping her baby.)

To the professionally outraged, there are obvious reasons for Siri’s political incorrectness and anti-choice slant.  Obviously, Steve Jobs and the programmers of Siri are part of a cabal of right-wing fundamentalists.  No doubt he answers directly to the Koch brothers, James Dobson, and the Pope.  Siri behaves this way because it wants to impose a right-wing lifestyle upon us, and make us all like the Duggars.  Either that, or Siri just has a terribly unfortunate defect that must be fixed, now.

However, just a few minutes of thinking should enable a reasonably intelligent person to figure out why Siri can’t find abortion clinics.  But thinking is hard, and a few minutes is a long time, so I will do Ms. Goodman’s thinking for her.

Abortion is not a word that people like to use.  Pro-abortion activists call themselves “pro-choice.”  Even abortionists don’t like to use the word.  For example, our local abortion clinic was called “American Women’s Services.”  What exactly are “women’s services?”  Does that include the free delivery of chocolate?    When this clinic closed, and the owner went to New Jersey and Maryland to perform the late term abortions that got him arrested for murder, his clinic didn’t even have a name.

If you look at other names for places that perform abortions, you will find similar use of euphemism.  You (or Siri)  would never guess that the “West Philadelphia Women’s Medical Society” performed abortions.  It sounds like a doctors’ association, not a place where illegal and late-term abortions were performed by unlicensed workers in unsanitary conditions.  Heck, even Planned Parenthood doesn’t sound like a place where you can get an abortion.

If Ms. Goodman wants Siri to figure out how to advise women how to terminate their pregnancies, then perhaps she should tell her pro-abortion friends to stop using euphemisms and put “abortion” in the name of their businesses.

Or, she could remember that Steve Jobs was adopted, after an unplanned pregnancy, and she could pause before urging Siri to potentially aid in the elimination of the next Steve Jobs.

Leave the Pronouns Alone, Ms. Bono, and Walk Away Slowly

In recent cultural news, Chaz Bono was eliminated from “Dancing With the Stars.” I don’t watch the show, but apparently the judges said that she “danced like a penguin,” compared her to an Ewok, and the general impression was that she stunk at dancing.  She was only put there to generate some controversy and hence, more viewers, not because of any talent or potential talent that she might have had.

I don’t really care that she got on “Dancing With the Stars” with a female partner in the first place.  After all, the shortage of men to dance with is an eternal problem, one noted by Elizabeth Bennet, who rebuked Mr. Darcy when she said, “Gentlemen were scarce, and more than one lady was forced to stand up with her sister.”  So the idea of a woman dancing with a woman is not novel.

I definitely don’t blame Chastity Bono for changing her name to Chaz.  If you want to name a daughter after one of the Puritan virtues, try “Faith,” “Hope,” “Charity,” or even “Patience” or “Silence.”  “Chastity” is just a bad idea for a name.  No one gets credit for living up to that virtue, but if you have that name and don’t live up to the virtue, prepare to hear about it forever.   You can also expect to have a terrible junior high school experience with a name like that.

I also hardly care that a transgender person got on DWTS.   Saint Paul predicted that women would behave badly in this and similar ways, as a result of their own sins and as a response to the sins of men in the surrounding culture.  With a 50% divorce rate, we are just about guaranteed to have all sorts of sexual confusions in our culture, and some of them will get on TV.  I know the producers of DWTS were trying to shock people like me when they picked Chaz Bono, but they failed.  Yawn….

There are two things I do care about, and those are the pronouns that are used to refer to her.  [Warning: I am about to say something terribly shocking and politically incorrect.]

CHAZ BONO IS A WOMAN.  SHE IS A SURGICALLY ALTERED WOMAN, AND MOST LIKELY A CONFUSED WOMAN, BUT SHE IS STILL A WOMAN.  And when we write about her, we need to be honest and say “she” and “her,” not “he” and “him.”

If you disagree, think about this.  Let’s say that Chaz Bono committed a crime.  Perhaps (speaking completely hypothetically, of course) she throttled one of the judges who gave her the boot, but in the process of throttling said judge, she was slightly injured and left some of her blood and skin at the scene of the crime.  If the police reached the crime scene and did a DNA test on the tissue sample, they would look for a female suspect.  Chaz Bono’s plastic surgeon would have created an extra challenge for the investigators, but the DNA would not be lying.

I know some of my readers are liberals who don’t care about the cold hard facts of present-day biology, and who think that gender is whatever you decide to be.  For those readers, please read the articles about Chaz  here and here, and listen to the way she expresses concerns about her weight and appearance.   She doesn’t sound one bit like a guy.   Chris Christie, Rush Limbaugh, or Michael Moore would not talk that way about their appearance.  For men, weight is a practical issue, and that is why we rarely ask, “Does this shirt make me look fat?”  We probably already know the answer.  But if we do ask, our wives can answer the question honestly, without fear, and we can put on a bigger shirt.  Apparently the surgery did not solve her body image problems, and one has to wonder if she, like many others who have had plastic surgery, would have been happier skipping the surgery, and seeing a counselor.  But that is a secondary point.  The main point is that the surgery and subsequent hormonal treatments did not cure her of being female.  And because the surgery did not ultimately change her, clear thinking people everywhere need to refer to Ms. Bono as “she.”

I recognize that this is a minority position that will face strong opposition, and I propose that this position be called “BC”, for “Biological Correctness.”  BC is only one of many necessary antidotes to Political Correctness.

Another Modest Proposal to Deal With the Debt Crisis

A few days ago, I posted “A Modest Proposal to Deal With the Debt Crisis.”  It seemed like a reasonable idea at the time, and it still seems like my idea will work better than some of the other ideas being proposed.  As I write this, the Senate is working on a bill that the House can agree too.  Of course, the House of Representatives is a tough crowd.  From the left, Representative Emanuel Cleaver called the bill a “Sugar-coated Satan sandwich.”  The Tea Party’s support is uncertain, so we could soon reach another impasse.  Even if the bill is passed, the rating of U.S. government bonds could go down.

However, I have a very simple solution to this problem:

LET’S JUST ASK ENGLAND TO TAKE US BACK.

I know that back in 1776 we had the Declaration of Independence.  It says that we declared independence because we experienced  “a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object… a design to reduce them [us] under absolute despotism” and then it went on to list the abuses.

But guess what?  George III is dead, and England has come a long way since then.

And independence didn’t always work out so well.  Take slavery, for example.  The British got rid of it peacefully, without a civil war, in 1834, a generation before we did.  But once we got the idea of leaving and starting another country, our Southern brethren had to try it again, with very messy results.

Then there’s the matter of taxation.  When we left England, tax rates were an intolerable 2-3% of our income.  (Less if you didn’t drink tea.)  Now, having declared that “taxation without representation is tyranny”, our taxes are consuming about 18% of our GDP.  Now that’s progress.  What would Patrick Henry think about this rate of taxation?

When we declared independence, we said that King George “has erected a multitude of new offices, and sent hither swarms of officers to harass our people, and eat out their substance.”  Yup, we sure solved that problem, and now we won’t even be able to buy incandescent light bulbs soon.  Imagine Sam Adams, patriot and brewer, being told he had to put health warning labels on his beer.  How long do you think he would put up with that?

So, we need to call Queen Elizabeth II, and tell her that it was all a big mistake, and could we please re-join the British Empire.

There would be just one condition.  The British throne would have to pass from Elizabeth to Prince William, bypassing Prince Charles.  Because English kings named Charles have not worked out so well, and Camilla is just too darn ugly to be Queen.

“How would this help our debt situation?” you might ask.  The answer is simple.  We have run up this debt during our unfortunate 225 year period of rebellion.  If we took the modest step of re-joining Great Britain, we would cease to be a country.

All of our government debt would melt away, just like Confederate War Bonds.

The Nanny State Strikes Again

I had to prove I was 18 at Wal-Mart today.  That wasn’t too hard.  I had my 11-year-old daughter and my 9-year-old son with me.  Even at the Ghetto-Mart, that proves I am at least 25.  Also, I was rather grumpy about being questioned.  I could have said “when I was your age….” and then told a story to the checkout clerk, and if that didn’t work I could have produced my driver’s license.  But I digress…

I was trying to buy a substance that you have to be 18 to buy.  No, it wasn’t a BB Gun, or ammunition, or even a Swiss Army knife.  The drinking age is 21, so it wasn’t liquor, although I could use a drink about now.  The controlled substance is…..

WD-40

Now we should all know what WD-40 does.  If you are from another continent, it is a nearly universal lubricant, and I was planning to use it on my kids’ bike chains.

But apparently some idiots like to use aerosol cans to get high, so store policy is not to sell spray paint, or WD-40, or any other product in a spray can, to minors. 

Because we all know that when someone  who is stupid enough to inhale stuff from aerosol cans turns 18, they become smart and won’t do it any more.  We also know that they won’t think to use hairspray or nail polish or whipped cream, because these things are bought by girls and are never abused. 

When I was the checkout clerk’s age, I was buying old bikes, fixing them, and re-selling them.  I guess I couldn’t do that if I were growing up now.

Just What We Need: A Building at Frontier Park

Pardon me while I rant.

The people of Erie seem to know how to enjoy Frontier Park pretty well.  On a nice day, there may be cross country and track teams of all ages running.  There are bunches of kids on the playgrounds, tennis players, walkers, joggers, and other nature lovers.  In the winter, people go sledding there.  It seems like a nice outdoor park.  In fact, it is so nice that often it is hard to find parking.

So naturally, someone wants to put a building there.  Not just a few restrooms, which would be a big improvement on the port-a-potties that are there now.  Apparently, we also need a classroom, because we can’t just enjoy the outdoors; we have to be “educated” about them, and if kids are having a field trip at the park, they may need to go inside due to bad weather.  The building will also have restrooms and some office space for the L.E.A.F. (Lake Erie Arboretum Foundation).

The $ 1,000,000, as usual, is from state grants, so everyone can claim it is “free” money, and no one has to worry too hard about whether the building is needed, or is just on someone’s wish list.

Does the state really have so much excess money that it should spend another $1 million on something like this?  I thought we had a budget crisis at just about every level of national, state, and local government.  A million here, a million there, and pretty soon you have a substantial amount of money.  Is it just possible that we should wait until tax revenues are meeting expenses before spending money on things we have done perfectly well  without for the last few decades?

Also, is it really a good idea to build an office in the middle of the park?  There is plenty of empty office space in Erie, and it is located in already existing buildings where parking is already available.  On a snowy or icy winter day, the office in the park will be difficult to get to.

Finally, why can’t we just have an outdoor park where people do stuff outside?  Why does there have to be an “educational center?”  Wouldn’t it be better for people to enjoy the outdoors, rather than think they have to learn about it all the time?